Is Anyone Else’s Perennial Ryegrass Plot Their Only Functioning Relationship?
Okay, so hear me out-I just need to know if I’m the only one whose batch of perennial ryegrass is literally the liveliest thing in my apartment right now. Forget roommates, significant others, or even my sourdough starter (RIP Chad, February–March 2024). My ryegrass actually listens, doesn’t judge, and, unlike my cat, keeps its opinions about my life choices to itself.
But get this-it’s thriving while every other houseplant is reenacting Little Shop of Horrors (but, like, the ending where Audrey II dies). I water, I talk sweetly, I give sunlight. Is the secret just… grass has lower standards? Or is it plotting something I’m too sleep-deprived to notice?
Anyone else here living with a suspiciously healthy patch of ryegrass while your “easy” snake plant perishes dramatically in the corner? Or did I just invent lawncore as a personality trait?